New member

Please take your time and introduce yourself to us - why Domestic Discipline, are you married, how your relationship progressed...
oldfashionedwife
Posts: 20
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2019 8:06 pm

New member

Post by oldfashionedwife » Mon Jun 17, 2019 11:16 pm

Hello...My name is Callie...I brought DD up to my husband when we were first married...He was a bit reluctant but read up on it anyway. He agreed to the principles and that we would do this. It's been yrs of stops and starts. Mostly because he is not consistant at all and his attempts at punishment are half hearted at best...I have told him several times that if he isn't comfortable with this then we don't have to do it but he always says this is what he wants...I can't seem to get him to understand that what he is doing is making me feel very ...unloved...not worth his time...Does anyone understand what I mean ? Also...at the bottom of the page it says attach a signature...I unclicked that box..I don't know what it means

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sweetie
Posts: 1126
Joined: Fri May 18, 2018 6:53 am
Location: United Kingdom

Re: New member

Post by sweetie » Tue Jun 18, 2019 1:31 am

oldfashionedwife wrote:
Mon Jun 17, 2019 11:16 pm
Hello...My name is Callie...I brought DD up to my husband when we were first married...He was a bit reluctant but read up on it anyway. He agreed to the principles and that we would do this. It's been yrs of stops and starts. Mostly because he is not consistant at all and his attempts at punishment are half hearted at best...I have told him several times that if he isn't comfortable with this then we don't have to do it but he always says this is what he wants...I can't seem to get him to understand that what he is doing is making me feel very ...unloved...not worth his time...Does anyone understand what I mean ? Also...at the bottom of the page it says attach a signature...I unclicked that box..I don't know what it means
Welcome oldfashionedwife. Hopefully you’ll get some good advice on here - it’s not something we’ve experienced much.

If you view your Profile (via drop down at the top of screen next to your username), you should find an option to Edit Profile and then Edit Signature. I think you’d then need to put the tick back in the Attach a signature box for your signature to show. My signature is below this post...

Good 🍀 luck. Hope you’re able to get your husband more onside...
sweetie x
Please inform MrsSweetie, my HoH, if I'm in any way impolite, disrespectful, inapproptiate, or cause any offence

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Miras
Posts: 508
Joined: Thu May 03, 2018 6:26 am
Location: Prague, Czech Republic

Re: New member

Post by Miras » Tue Jun 18, 2019 2:06 am

Welcome and good luck with getting husband on board!
Occasionally friendly Spencerist guy
Faktor IV of MdI - Maghan
Unofficial member of The Wicked Tribe
Putting DD back into BuDDhism

Goldilocks
Posts: 350
Joined: Sun Mar 26, 2017 2:34 pm
Location: Ohio

Re: New member

Post by Goldilocks » Tue Jun 18, 2019 4:26 am

Welcome, oldfashionedwife!
Can I ask how long you have been married or how long you have been. In a DD marriage?
Loving submissive wife to PapaBear.

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Beauty
Posts: 250
Joined: Wed Nov 21, 2018 10:43 am

Re: New member

Post by Beauty » Tue Jun 18, 2019 7:36 am

Welcome! It is very frustrating when consistency isn’t there. I can completely relate to it making you feel unloved. I can only suggest to keep trying at it without calling quits no matter how bad something wasn’t followed up on. When able to stop and start whenever that can make DD seem like a back-burner thing and not as important. When starting or in this case restarting I do think it needs to be talked about constantly and main topic. Eventually it just becomes apart of y’all and doesn’t have to be forefront. If that makes sense. It may not be as natural for him so he needs to have it become more of a habit and maybe then he can start acting on things automatically. Even people who have been in DD for years still mention times of consistency slip ups. They hurt but its bound to happen from time to time. Hope that helps some. Good luck ❤️
Happy to be taken in hand by my Beast

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NateG
Posts: 751
Joined: Mon Jan 08, 2018 7:34 pm
Location: Virginia

Re: New member

Post by NateG » Tue Jun 18, 2019 11:49 am

Welcome,

Yes, it is sometimes hard to be consistent. But I find that many woman feel as you do when things get slack. Our marriage is better and we are happier when actively engaged in DD. Keep talking to him.

Nate

oldfashionedwife
Posts: 20
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2019 8:06 pm

Re: New member

Post by oldfashionedwife » Tue Jun 18, 2019 10:10 pm

I hope I am replying in the right place ! Goldilocks we have been married for 33 yrs... This lifestyle is what I felt I needed way before I knew what DD was...So pretty much fromthe beginning of our marriage I had talked to him about it...

Joshua89
Posts: 635
Joined: Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:13 pm

Re: New member

Post by Joshua89 » Wed Jun 19, 2019 2:21 am

oldfashionedwife wrote:
Tue Jun 18, 2019 10:10 pm
I hope I am replying in the right place ! Goldilocks we have been married for 33 yrs... This lifestyle is what I felt I needed way before I knew what DD was...So pretty much fromthe beginning of our marriage I had talked to him about it...
I am in the same boat. When life gets in the way and your good deeds and short comings both go "un-noticed" it can feel "lonely" I suppose? Like you are in it all alone. You just might need a good dd book, or work book to keep the topic relevant in your daily lives when you fall off the wheels, I like to think that most people have ups and downs throughout the year. You are not alone in that feeling. Best of luck to you both. I'd suggest having a daily conversation regarding goods and bad throughout the day and set goals with consequences and possibly rewards if he is into that.
Ephesians 5:25 - Husbands love your wife just as Christ loved the church, he gave up his life for her.

kgirl
Posts: 119
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2017 10:37 pm
Location: Ohio

Re: New member

Post by kgirl » Wed Jun 19, 2019 8:26 am

Welcome! Consistency has always been a struggle due to everyday life. You're not alone! :)

Goldilocks
Posts: 350
Joined: Sun Mar 26, 2017 2:34 pm
Location: Ohio

Re: New member

Post by Goldilocks » Wed Jun 19, 2019 9:24 am

oldfashionedwife wrote:
Tue Jun 18, 2019 10:10 pm
I hope I am replying in the right place ! Goldilocks we have been married for 33 yrs... This lifestyle is what I felt I needed way before I knew what DD was...So pretty much fromthe beginning of our marriage I had talked to him about it...
Well...first off congrats on 33 years of marriage. I do understand what you mean by feeling not worth his time.
It's easy to fall into that mindset when things are more inconsistent than consistent. I have been there. It sucks.
But I agree with Beauty. Talking about DD steadily may help keep it in the for front of his mind.
As far as half hearted punishments go...ive been there too. I don't know if this has happened for you or not, but the first time my husband caught on to what I needed from a spanking, we both cried. He spanked me through tears and beyond. But it was very hard on him. That's why he cried, too.
Try asking him questions (f you havent already) like, "what do you want out of DD?" , What changes would you like to see?" Ask him what he thinks is an effective spanking. Then maybe you could express all you want and need from a spanking. Spankings can also be a way to reconnect and reset. Hopefully you can express this to him and he will fulfill that void.
Good luck hun. Keep us updated!
Loving submissive wife to PapaBear.

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