Quick intro

Please take your time and introduce yourself to us - why Domestic Discipline, are you married, how your relationship progressed...
Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Quick intro

Post by Jwalker » Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:53 am

I have been lurking here and finally registered. I am struggling to write an introduction, and once you read it, may understand how I have gravitated to this forum.

B and I have been married for 13 years. It has always been a happy carefree marriage.we are respectful of each other and truly happy. I have always had a spanking fetish or at least interest.B has not.

After my last long term relationship, in which I had a controlling, verbally abusive and financially irresponsible girlfriend, I decided never again. When I began dating, I was much more clear about my desires and started to be more of a man that could lead a household. There were three women I had relationships with that all were introduced to disciplinary spankings. One hated it, and it was a reason we ceased dating.the others kind of just ran their course, of not being soulmates.

When I met B, I fell head over heels and that side of me was put away for a long time. She was spanked once before we were married.it was definitely not as consensual as it is now. She spent some of our wedding savings on a girls trip, that her friend was supposedly footing the bill for. Upon finding out her deceit, I told her she would be punished by spanking. She agreed, but kind of thought it was going to be another fun, sexual game type. The spanking probably lasted about 2 minutes, she was red and crying.she then knew what I meant to do when she had poor behavior.

Flash forward ten years of no spankings and pure bliss. Of course there were times that may have merited a spanking, but it simply wasn’t done or necessary. I was in charge, but there wasn’t necessarily a dom/sub vibe to the marriage.

This is already very long, so I will stop here for now before the marriage started to transform.

kgirl
Posts: 122
Joined: Sat Mar 25, 2017 10:37 pm
Location: Ohio

Re: Quick intro

Post by kgirl » Wed Mar 06, 2019 8:12 am

Jwalker wrote:
Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:53 am
I have been lurking here and finally registered. I am struggling to write an introduction, and once you read it, may understand how I have gravitated to this forum.

B and I have been married for 13 years. It has always been a happy carefree marriage.we are respectful of each other and truly happy. I have always had a spanking fetish or at least interest.B has not.

After my last long term relationship, in which I had a controlling, verbally abusive and financially irresponsible girlfriend, I decided never again. When I began dating, I was much more clear about my desires and started to be more of a man that could lead a household. There were three women I had relationships with that all were introduced to disciplinary spankings. One hated it, and it was a reason we ceased dating.the others kind of just ran their course, of not being soulmates.

When I met B, I fell head over heels and that side of me was put away for a long time. She was spanked once before we were married.it was definitely not as consensual as it is now. She spent some of our wedding savings on a girls trip, that her friend was supposedly footing the bill for. Upon finding out her deceit, I told her she would be punished by spanking. She agreed, but kind of thought it was going to be another fun, sexual game type. The spanking probably lasted about 2 minutes, she was red and crying.she then knew what I meant to do when she had poor behavior.

Flash forward ten years of no spankings and pure bliss. Of course there were times that may have merited a spanking, but it simply wasn’t done or necessary. I was in charge, but there wasn’t necessarily a dom/sub vibe to the marriage.

This is already very long, so I will stop here for now before the marriage started to transform.
Hi and welcome!!! :) Trying to read you correctly. It sounds like you are a dominant husband, but the two of you don't have an official DD marriage. Am I right? Have you talked to her about DD? Are there certain rules you would like to enforce or add? Look forward to hearing from you!

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Phil04
Posts: 204
Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2018 8:42 am
Location: Texas

Re: Quick intro

Post by Phil04 » Wed Mar 06, 2019 11:13 am

Welcome aboard. Looking forward to reading more of your story.

Phil

User avatar
DesertRose
Posts: 347
Joined: Sun Jul 22, 2018 1:34 pm

Re: Quick intro

Post by DesertRose » Wed Mar 06, 2019 3:55 pm

This was an interesting introduction Jwalker. Welcome here and I look forward to read more from you.
🌸 I want a husband who will love me enough to punish me.
DesertRose

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: Quick intro

Post by Jwalker » Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:37 pm

Thank you all for the kind words.

We were continuing on as a couple, when we decided to start a family. This scared the heck out of me, but I knew it was selfish to deny her. At this point, we started to talk about a few rules etc. one of them is she will take a spanking when she is naughty.she also addresses me as sir, when it is appropriate ( she knows by the tone of my voice). Other than that, no other aspects of DD existed. (Cornertime,forced nudity or anything else) Obviously, (hopefully it’s obvious), there were no spankings during pregnancy.

After 6 months or so, she finally earned one. Again, she seemed surprised by the idea of actuallly being spanked by me. This spanking again was under 5 minutes, with my hand and caused redness and tears.it set the tone for the next year or so behavior wise.

After that, she began to snap, and be disrespectful. We started Sunday “maintenance” but she hasn’t read anything about DD and doesn’t know that I do either. Her maintenance is over my lap with some playful swats mixed with a few sharp ones if needed.it is more ceremonial than what others consider maintenance

I guess my questions and concerns are if I have coerced her into this and back off or since this is the path we are on, just continue it. It’s safe to say she doesn’t like to be spanked, but unlike everyone else we know, we don’t fight. She doesn’t have the reaction that a true submissive would and that’s fine with me.i don’t need it connected to anything sexual, just need it to be part of our reality.

Hope some of that made sense, happy to answer questions to clarify

User avatar
Phil04
Posts: 204
Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2018 8:42 am
Location: Texas

Re: Quick intro

Post by Phil04 » Wed Mar 06, 2019 8:27 pm

You are welcome to ask here, and I am sure you will get a variety of opinions. However, you need to be talking to her. Have a long discussion about the benefits, and your concerns and ask her if she wants to continue. Her's is really the opinion that matters.

Phil

Kerry
Posts: 678
Joined: Wed Oct 04, 2017 11:54 pm

Re: Quick intro

Post by Kerry » Wed Mar 06, 2019 8:58 pm

Enjoyed reading your posts. I’m a little lost on your time line. I think I’d agree that you need more of a discussion and figure out the cause of her behavior change too. Is she stressed by motherhood?
Key

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: Quick intro

Post by Jwalker » Wed Mar 06, 2019 9:30 pm

She is completely ignorant of this lifestyle and my interest in it. All she knows is she is susceptible to being spanked. She probably thinks she is unique in this, or more so that I am.i told her how I did spank before her.

Yes, motherhood comes with a higher stress level. But my reintroducing spanking was to keep our marriage as it was before.she agrees that the Sunday routine helps her.

As for asking her about it, she would immediately cease. She hates being spanked but it is important to me and that’s why she agrees to it. As I described, she has had two (and maybe a half) real ones, with another about to occur if she doesn’t complete a certain task this month.

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: Quick intro

Post by Jwalker » Wed Mar 06, 2019 9:39 pm

Also she does she some positives in it. Her sister has a few strained relationships and she told me once that she she could use a good soanking. Yes, they were both spanked infrequently growing up.

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: Quick intro

Post by Jwalker » Mon Apr 15, 2019 9:38 pm

So I am unsure if I should post updates here or start a new thread. We talked quite a bit and she wanted to stop the spankings.she was ok with continuing our “maintenance” which is more ceremonial than anything else. She also agreed to more official type punishments, with a set number of strokes with the belt. However, she wants to stop the over the knee spankings that don’t have a set time limit and really leave her in tears. Granted she has only had two of these in all these years, but has recently earned a third.thats what started this discussion and I think she is saying this entirely to avoid it. Thoughts?

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