I am curious - and not yellow.

[Rand E]

I was definitely being facetious there. I certainly don't mean to imply that it's only upside for the dom and downside for the sub. The relationship, at it's core, can be mutually nurturing and beneficial, a win-win situation for both you and your spouse, however you decide and agree to handle it.

As far as whether you have an interest in the occasional role reversal, that's obviously a personal preference kind of thing. Don't you ever like to win sometimes, even a little bit? All I can say is, when it works, I find it mega stimulating.

Rand E,

I want to make sure I am understanding you. Are you saying that the sub never wins? Only the Dom or HOH?

[Lovely]

As far as whether you have an interest in the occasional role reversal, that's obviously a personal preference kind of thing. Don't you ever like to win sometimes, even a little bit? All I can say is, when it works, I find it mega-stimulating.

Oh, I certainly "win" plenty. An example from just a few days ago- I was going to be punished for something but after discussing it prior to the punishment I convinced my husband that I really shouldn't be punished. I "won" as you put it. Dionysyus also frequently puts my needs first despite being the HoH. He will do things like re-fill my water bottle for me if I have forgotten and already got into bed without filling it, or fetch things for me if I am occupied with the children and unable. Just because he's the Dominant and I'm the submissive doesn't mean that everything is only ever for his benefit. It's actually a very reciprocal relationship based on mutual respect. However, I'm the one who gets punished for wrong doings, and he's the one who always has the final say in everything (with taking my opinions into strong consideration).

[Rand E]

Yes. I definitely see that. I was really being a bit facetious. I'm not questioning the roles you have adopted in your DD relationship. And frankly, a lot of you subs out there sound like awesome spouses. Probably better than my wife - I can say that because she won't see this. Your dom husbands and wives are very lucky and I hope they appreciate you all.

As far as whether you have an interest in the occasional role reversal, that's obviously a personal preference kind of thing. Don't you ever like to win sometimes, even a little bit? All I can say is, when it works, I find it mega-stimulating.

Oh, I certainly "win" plenty. An example from just a few days ago- I was going to be punished for something but after discussing it prior to the punishment I convinced my husband that I really shouldn't be punished. I "won" as you put it. Dionysyus also frequently puts my needs first despite being the HoH. He will do things like re-fill my water bottle for me if I have forgotten and already got into bed without filling it, or fetch things for me if I am occupied with the children and unable. Just because he's the Dominant and I'm the submissive doesn't mean that everything is only ever for his benefit. It's actually a very reciprocal relationship based on mutual respect. However, I'm the one who gets punished for wrong doings, and he's the one who always has the final say in everything (with taking my opinions into strong consideration).

[Rand E]

Interesting! Learn something new every day.

BTW: I also hate the way they always lump B&D and S&M together. For me, these are also different things, with maybe some overlap. But there again, that's a distinction that is probably not well understood by the general public.

You might find it interesting to know that BDSM actually stands for 3 separate pairs, not two. BD= Bondage and Discipline, DS= Domination and submission, SM= Sadism and masochism.