Hey everyone!

Please take your time and introduce yourself to us - why Domestic Discipline, are you married, how your relationship progressed...
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undergroundgravity
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2021 4:52 am

Hey everyone!

Post by undergroundgravity » Sat Mar 06, 2021 5:07 am

My name's Alyssa and I'm 29 years old. I've been married to my husband for close to 7 years but we've known each other since we were fairly young. We started dating senior year of high school and got married straight out of college and now have a 2-year-old boy! Originally DD wasn't part of our relationship, but a few years ago I heard about it and it really drew me in so I casually mentioned it to my husband. He was curious too and we decided to give it a test run for a month. Needles to say that month turned into going on 5 years. He was a little shy at first but he really embraced his role as leader and HoH. I've always been more of a follower (this was even the case before we started DD) so it wasn't as tough of an adjustment for me (but I'll admit it did take a little while to get used to, lol). But all in all DD has really helped me grow as a person and I don't think I'd be as happy or satisfied with life as I am right now without it.

Emily
Posts: 591
Joined: Fri Nov 08, 2019 3:49 am
Location: UK

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by Emily » Sat Mar 06, 2021 6:25 am

Welcome! :)
Happily married to the most wonderful and loving guy! 💖💖💖

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Miras
Posts: 871
Joined: Thu May 03, 2018 6:26 am
Location: Prague, Czech Republic

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by Miras » Sat Mar 06, 2021 8:40 am

Welcome, Alyssa!
Occasionally friendly Spencerist guy
Faktor IV of MdI - Maghan
Unofficial member of The Wicked Tribe
Putting DD back into BuDDhism

VernAKmiss
Posts: 157
Joined: Sat Oct 31, 2020 12:18 am

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by VernAKmiss » Sat Mar 06, 2021 1:45 pm

Welcome!! Awesome that DD has made its way into your marriage. Would you mind sharing a little bit more about your dynamic?? We are in a similar boat where we didn’t start our using DD, I always had an attraction to spanking but never fully understood DD until just last year. When I shared it with my husband, we began practicing and learning in November and aren’t super consistent and I’m also pregnant with #5 and he works long hours so we’re still navigating how to in cooperate it into our lives effectively. I love learning from those a bit further along in the journey. ♥️

undergroundgravity
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2021 4:52 am

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by undergroundgravity » Sun Mar 07, 2021 3:16 am

VernAKmiss wrote:
Sat Mar 06, 2021 1:45 pm
Welcome!! Awesome that DD has made its way into your marriage. Would you mind sharing a little bit more about your dynamic?? We are in a similar boat where we didn’t start our using DD, I always had an attraction to spanking but never fully understood DD until just last year. When I shared it with my husband, we began practicing and learning in November and aren’t super consistent and I’m also pregnant with #5 and he works long hours so we’re still navigating how to in cooperate it into our lives effectively. I love learning from those a bit further along in the journey. ♥️
Sure! It's a lot to explain so what particulars would you like to know?

VernAKmiss
Posts: 157
Joined: Sat Oct 31, 2020 12:18 am

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by VernAKmiss » Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:12 pm

undergroundgravity wrote:
Sun Mar 07, 2021 3:16 am
VernAKmiss wrote:
Sat Mar 06, 2021 1:45 pm
Sure! It's a lot to explain so what particulars would you like to know?

Do you have rules/goals or certain expectations? Does your husband implement maintenance? Does he have a favorite implement or position? Does he use any other forms of discipline besides spanking?? What sorts of struggles have you guys over come along the journal?? Any recommendations or advice for newer couples in the DD journey? Thank you!

undergroundgravity
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Mar 06, 2021 4:52 am

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by undergroundgravity » Sun Mar 07, 2021 9:34 pm

VernAKmiss wrote:
Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:12 pm
undergroundgravity wrote:
Sun Mar 07, 2021 3:16 am
VernAKmiss wrote:
Sat Mar 06, 2021 1:45 pm
Sure! It's a lot to explain so what particulars would you like to know?

Do you have rules/goals or certain expectations? Does your husband implement maintenance? Does he have a favorite implement or position? Does he use any other forms of discipline besides spanking?? What sorts of struggles have you guys over come along the journal?? Any recommendations or advice for newer couples in the DD journey? Thank you!
I don't have written rules so much as unwritten expectations: always be respectful, defer to him, be modest, don't get an attitude, keep the house looking clean, don't question his punishments. Basic stuff. We've got a mutual understanding of sorts.

I do get maintenance, usually once per week but sometimes less often if I've been on good behavior. When I do get spanked it's almost always over the knee, I'll be stripped down and he usually uses his bare hand. Paddle for more serious offenses.

We've both had our insecurities along the way. A few months after we started exploring DD, after a particularly nasty spanking, he left the room as he usually does to give me some time to think about my actions. But that day for whatever reason I just wasn't feeling it and I broke down crying. After maybe 15 minutes he came back and I was totally out of it, showing more emotion than I ever had before in my life. So he told me to sit up and I did, and he gave me a hug and held me there for a few minutes until I calmed down and could clear my head. He asked me if I wanted to take a break from DD and I'll have to admit I considered it. But I told him no. I realized it wasn't his fault and it wasn't DD's fault - it was my fault - and stopping it would have just made me feel guilty and even more emotional. He did step back the harder spankings for a while, though, and we started to be more open with each other. I don't regret anything.

As for advice - I'd just say be patient. Listen to each other's feelings. Be open with communication. Yes, he's the HoH but he should listen to you. Otherwise that's just setting up for failure.

Axel
Posts: 89
Joined: Wed Dec 09, 2020 4:12 pm
Location: Sweden

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by Axel » Mon Mar 08, 2021 5:27 am

Welcome!
Nice to have you here!
Axel

KrystalA
Posts: 479
Joined: Thu Jan 11, 2018 4:11 pm
Location: Arizona

Re: Hey everyone!

Post by KrystalA » Thu Mar 11, 2021 3:22 pm

undergroundgravity wrote:
Sat Mar 06, 2021 5:07 am
My name's Alyssa and I'm 29 years old. I've been married to my husband for close to 7 years but we've known each other since we were fairly young. We started dating senior year of high school and got married straight out of college and now have a 2-year-old boy! Originally DD wasn't part of our relationship, but a few years ago I heard about it and it really drew me in so I casually mentioned it to my husband. He was curious too and we decided to give it a test run for a month. Needles to say that month turned into going on 5 years. He was a little shy at first but he really embraced his role as leader and HoH. I've always been more of a follower (this was even the case before we started DD) so it wasn't as tough of an adjustment for me (but I'll admit it did take a little while to get used to, lol). But all in all DD has really helped me grow as a person and I don't think I'd be as happy or satisfied with life as I am right now without it.
I love your story. Sounds like you are in a wonderful place in life :) I happy to hear DD is part of your marriage. My husband and I live the life but not strictly. I am working crazy long hours and each week my schedule changes lol so we have not had a schedule time or discipline or maintenance.
Burning butt keeps me in line :)

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