Hello

Please take your time and introduce yourself to us - why Domestic Discipline, are you married, how your relationship progressed...
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Blueb
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue May 05, 2020 1:26 am

Hello

Post by Blueb » Mon May 18, 2020 4:14 pm

Hi all. I have been married for 5 years but we started DD when we were dating but we were not consistent. Just recently my husband surprised me saying if I didn’t do certain things everyday he would give me one swat for each thing. That isn’t really a deterrent for me and he has only followed through a couple time. I thought I was over wanting this lifestyle but him bringing it up again has got me interested again. He has never given me a hard spanking and I am not sure that he is even willing to and I am not sure that I would want a DD relationship if I knew what a hard spanking felt like.

Basically right now I am just reading a ton and trying to figure out a way to ask my husband if this really is something he wants to do. But I would need him to punish me harder than just a swat. But then, would I be topping from bottom.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings.

Lauren
Posts: 1083
Joined: Sat Feb 03, 2018 6:45 pm
Location: Wisconsin

Re: Hello

Post by Lauren » Mon May 18, 2020 4:36 pm

Welcome!

JackOfHearts
Posts: 56
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2019 9:18 am

Re: Hello

Post by JackOfHearts » Mon May 18, 2020 4:59 pm

Hello and welcome!

How did you start the DD when you were dating? Was it your idea?

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Beauty
Posts: 475
Joined: Wed Nov 21, 2018 10:43 am

Re: Hello

Post by Beauty » Mon May 18, 2020 7:04 pm

Welcome! I find one or two swats annoying. For us they are meant as a watch it before a hard spanking comes but I very much understand it not being a real deterrent. Best I can say is talk with him purely on how you feel but then allow him to decide the next steps.
Happy to be taken in hand by my Beast

Olivia
Posts: 441
Joined: Mon Nov 25, 2019 11:09 am

Re: Hello

Post by Olivia » Mon May 18, 2020 7:22 pm

Welcome!!!

Blueb
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue May 05, 2020 1:26 am

Re: Hello

Post by Blueb » Mon May 18, 2020 11:38 pm

JackOfHearts wrote:
Mon May 18, 2020 4:59 pm
Hello and welcome!

How did you start the DD when you were dating? Was it your idea?
It was my idea. I came across the old Learning DD site (I miss those blog posts) before we started dating and was fascinated. We had been dating a few months when I finally brought it up to him. It only lasted a month or so and just fizzled out. He was never consistent like I said never spanked hard enough to deter any behavior. I think he thought that because I liked spanking during sex then they couldn’t be used for a punishment.

Blueb
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue May 05, 2020 1:26 am

Re: Hello

Post by Blueb » Mon May 18, 2020 11:40 pm

Beauty wrote:
Mon May 18, 2020 7:04 pm
Welcome! I find one or two swats annoying. For us they are meant as a watch it before a hard spanking comes but I very much understand it not being a real deterrent. Best I can say is talk with him purely on how you feel but then allow him to decide the next steps.
You are right. I just need to talk with him. I think I am just nervous that he will say yes but then nothing come from it. Or he will say yes and I will get my first real punishment spanking and decide I just like play ones. We have such a good thing going, I don’t want to rock the boat.

Emily
Posts: 378
Joined: Fri Nov 08, 2019 3:49 am
Location: UK

Re: Hello

Post by Emily » Tue May 19, 2020 2:06 am

Welcome! :)

JackOfHearts
Posts: 56
Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2019 9:18 am

Re: Hello

Post by JackOfHearts » Tue May 19, 2020 2:33 am

Blueb wrote:
Mon May 18, 2020 11:40 pm
Beauty wrote:
Mon May 18, 2020 7:04 pm
Welcome! I find one or two swats annoying. For us they are meant as a watch it before a hard spanking comes but I very much understand it not being a real deterrent. Best I can say is talk with him purely on how you feel but then allow him to decide the next steps.
You are right. I just need to talk with him. I think I am just nervous that he will say yes but then nothing come from it. Or he will say yes and I will get my first real punishment spanking and decide I just like play ones. We have such a good thing going, I don’t want to rock the boat.
In my view, punishments should not be enjoyable but a deterrent for misbehavior. I can’t fully understand, because I’m on the other side of the coin, but I think it’s more about liking the process, the dynamics and the cuddles afterwards. Or maybe liking the unliked, so to speak. But yes, a real spanking can be quite intense, it’s not everyone’s cup of tea and some people really dislike it.

Cutie
Posts: 31
Joined: Sat Feb 08, 2020 4:16 pm

Re: Hello

Post by Cutie » Tue May 19, 2020 7:19 pm

Welcome Blueb :P

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