Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

New blog posts from Domestic-Discipline.net.
Rand E
Posts: 374
Joined: Thu Jul 12, 2018 5:45 pm
Location: Los Angeles

Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Rand E » Fri Jan 10, 2020 12:02 am

Post : Personal: Staying on track with Domestic Discipline
URL : http://domestic-discipline.net/staying- ... iscipline/
Posted : December 20, 2017 at 10:41 am
Author : Clint
Tags : Consent, Consistency, Domestic Discipline, Personal Entries, Personal Stories
Categories : Head of Household - Challenges, Personal entries, Submissive partners: the submissive life

One thing I’ve noticed about domestic discipline over the years is that the word “inconsistency” means so many things to different people. For some, just not following through on one or two punishments can earn the label of an inconsistent HOH, while for others it would mean the entire lifestyle dynamic not being held up to what it was. I’ll admit that, with our past pregnancies, inconsistency was something that we experienced. In fact, in our recent questionnaire for our DD-versary the one thing that Clint and I both named as one of our hardest domestic discipline moments was getting DD back on track after moving, but the inconsistency from that and the “falling off track” actually started during the pregnancy and the move just kind of compounded everything. So, needless to say, both Clint and I were a little worried about things falling off track again this time when we first found out we were expecting. One thing that was important to both of us was to make sure that the overall dynamic of domestic discipline (in terms of leadership and submission) stayed the same while the punishments would not (obviously).

http://domestic-discipline.net/wp-conte ... 00x225.jpg

This is one of those “easier said than done” moments. It was easy for us to sit down and say, “we aren’t stopping domestic discipline” because we both don’t believe in stopping/starting the lifestyle. However, it’s no secret that things have definitely changed. During the beginning of the pregnancy, things went on relatively the same as they always have. Staying on top of domestic discipline didn’t seem so hard. Punishments were infrequent, but not due to lack of consistency (I just didn’t break many rules) and the dynamic itself was like it always had been. Things were looking good.

It likely didn’t have anything to do with the pregnancy, but every so often after a “good streak” I tend to have moments where the rules get broken. Sometimes it’s one rule, or sometimes it’s several rules compounded on top of each other. I can’t explain why this happens other than the phrase “I’m not perfect”. I was actually trying really hard for this not to happen during the pregnancy to not have to put Clint in the position to hold me accountable, but I failed.

Things started to get trickier when we found out recently that I was sick. Up until then we had used alternative punishments when they did need to occur, but even the alternative punishments seemed harsh to Clint and I can understand why. We found out I was really sick (life threatening kind of thing) and although it’s treatable (when I’m not pregnant) it’s one of those things that all of the sudden punishing me for an offense just seemed wrong. I had to admit, I was skeptical when I saw him beginning to back off a little bit and I wondered if inconsistency was going to become a problem. The last thing I wanted was for it to take us months to get back on track with domestic discipline again, let alone all of the stress and emotions that come with that. But, I understood his reason.

It took some time (a few weeks, I’d say) for me to realize that this isn’t inconsistency at all. Clint definitely still noticed when rules were broken, and they were (unintentionally) happening more frequently as the stress of everything became bigger. He would point it out and, occasionally, let me know that he’s “keeping track of all of these offenses to deal with later”. I’ve come to know, over the course of the 7+ years we’ve been doing domestic discipline, that he is serious on that. And, the threat alone is usually enough to make me stop dead in my tracks – no punishment needed.

He’s being very consistent with the lifestyle, and our dynamic hasn’t changed. The punishments may have, temporarily (and, for a good reason) but the dynamic is still very much there. I still try hard to be a submissive wife, and he’s still embraced his role as HOH and leader, making the final decisions, being the authority figure, looking out for me and our kids, and more. Those are all traits of domestic discipline that I think are overlooked when people focus so heavily on the punishment aspect.

The pregnancy is coming to an end, and soon things will be back to normal. It will take some time, assuming the delivery and all that goes well, because I still have to go through a few rounds of treatment to cure this blood disorder. But, once that’s behind us, I’m looking forward to things being back to normal. Until then, I’m content with where we are. We may be slightly off track, but our dynamic is still in tact and that’s good enough for me.

Teddybear
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Mar 18, 2020 8:46 pm

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Teddybear » Thu Mar 19, 2020 5:18 pm

thank you for your post i am new to this and dd lifestyle and i have a hard time staying on track and when it see my baby bear miss her dinner shot and i know that is breaking a rule and i need to discipline her right away but we live with her mother and i want to give her the spanking right away, but with her mother there it gets in the way.

I am wondering if you have any thoughts on that.

User avatar
MyLove
Posts: 352
Joined: Tue Sep 25, 2018 12:34 pm

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by MyLove » Fri Mar 20, 2020 9:56 am

Teddybear wrote:
Thu Mar 19, 2020 5:18 pm
thank you for your post i am new to this and dd lifestyle and i have a hard time staying on track and when it see my baby bear miss her dinner shot and i know that is breaking a rule and i need to discipline her right away but we live with her mother and i want to give her the spanking right away, but with her mother there it gets in the way.

I am wondering if you have any thoughts on that.
I can only speak as a submissive partner, but is your fiancee forgetting, or is the rule break deliberate? If she is just forgetting her shot, my HoH would handle it very differently than if I just didn't want to do it, so chose not to.(Understandable, needles suck, but not a good reason to break a rule deliberately.)

-ML💕
Led in love by Phil04, and learning to submit by the Grace of God. Naturally submissive, but not perfectly so, I am praying for a pure heart and virtuous character. 💕

babybear_4_TB
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Mar 18, 2020 9:00 pm

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by babybear_4_TB » Fri Mar 20, 2020 10:39 am

MyLove,

That is a very good question, but I would never break a rule on purpose. I want to take my shot, I want to make TeddyBear happy and proud, I want to live a long time and be with my TeddyBear. I just forget literally no clue until , if he asks, did you take your shot... Then I'm like CRAPPPP!

I will never lie to him so as soon as that question comes out my head drops my eyes tear up and I whisper my answer. Sometimes I might answer back sarcastically but it's only because I'm angry with myself.

Waiting is VERY hard for me, but living with my mother it's almost a have too.

May I know how your HoH would handle it? If that is too personal I understand
baby bear

TiH by my Fiance' TeddyBear.

Please contact him if I am out of line.

User avatar
MyLove
Posts: 352
Joined: Tue Sep 25, 2018 12:34 pm

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by MyLove » Fri Mar 20, 2020 1:31 pm

babybear_4_TB wrote:
Fri Mar 20, 2020 10:39 am
MyLove,

That is a very good question, but I would never break a rule on purpose. I want to take my shot, I want to make TeddyBear happy and proud, I want to live a long time and be with my TeddyBear. I just forget literally no clue until , if he asks, did you take your shot... Then I'm like CRAPPPP!

I will never lie to him so as soon as that question comes out my head drops my eyes tear up and I whisper my answer. Sometimes I might answer back sarcastically but it's only because I'm angry with myself.

Waiting is VERY hard for me, but living with my mother it's almost a have too.

May I know how your HoH would handle it? If that is too personal I understand
Of course, you can certainly ask! I have a similar situation, where I am required to take my vitamins and supliments that help me manage a genetic condition that could be life-threatening if I did nothing. So that falls under the Dangerous category of the four Ds for us. Also, if I neglect my B12, I get very sluggish, and can't carry out my responsibilities as a stay at home mother, which is unacceptable, as well. If I take it late, it disturbs my sleep, making me more tired, and more forgetful, so I am required to take everything by noon.

At first it was very hard to remember. Like you, I have a submissive nature, and a deep desire to make my HoH proud. But forming new habits is so hard! I was spanked a lot for breaking this rule as I adjusted to the new routine, and it was discouraging.
A few things that helped me remember were:
1. I set an alarm on my phone for 15 minutes before everything was due.

2. I had an extra B12 bottle in the car, so if I forgot to take everything in the morning, at least I wouldn't be too exhausted to complete my other tasks, and get in more trouble. (Some of the supplements can't be stored in a hot car in the Texas sun. Also, I keep forgetting to put a days worth in my purse.🤦)

3. I found that an established morning routine helps me tremendously. For me that involved waking up early and having a cup of coffee, taking my supplements, and then getting ready to take the kids to school. Now that that has been disrupted with the coronavirus, I am struggling to establish a new routine, and the alarm has been my saving grace.

I realize that some of this advice might not transfer for you, as maybe you don't eat dinner at the same time every evening, but if you can find a way to remind yourself before you sit down, that will help. Sitting down on a sore bottom will likely remind you, too. :shock: It just may take awhile.

We don't discipline right after the rule break, because we have children that we don't want to hear, so it almost always happens after the kids are in bed and asleep. An effective lecture, and thorough punishment is a sufficient reminder for us.

If you or your HoH want specifics about how he would discipline me in your situation, it would probably be better coming from him. I will ask if he'd be willing to chime in here. :)

-ML💕
Led in love by Phil04, and learning to submit by the Grace of God. Naturally submissive, but not perfectly so, I am praying for a pure heart and virtuous character. 💕

User avatar
Phil04
Posts: 375
Joined: Wed Aug 22, 2018 8:42 am
Location: Texas

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Phil04 » Fri Mar 20, 2020 2:02 pm

I think My_Love covered it well, but I am happy to answer questions from an HOH perspective if you have any.

Phil04

Joshua89
Posts: 723
Joined: Wed Nov 01, 2017 3:13 pm

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Joshua89 » Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:35 pm

Is everyone staying "on track" through these difficult times?

I find myself needed more structure than ever before with all the chaos.
Submissive ❤ Loving Husband + LovingAndStrict06

Olivia
Posts: 575
Joined: Mon Nov 25, 2019 11:09 am

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Olivia » Fri Mar 27, 2020 5:22 pm

I've also felt the need for increased structure lately! We've also had more time on our hands so we've spent some extra time looking at our dd relationship and putting some work in which has been good for us :)

Rand E
Posts: 374
Joined: Thu Jul 12, 2018 5:45 pm
Location: Los Angeles

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Rand E » Fri Mar 27, 2020 8:27 pm

Well, it's been a bit of the opposite for my wife and me. All these challenges just put everything in a different light. We don't need the influence of the paddle to pull together and cooperate. We just have to support each other and work this out together as a family team regardless. When the dust settles on these trying times, we will come back to the DD arrangement with an improved perspective and a wiser set of priorities. But it's just not our focus for the moment.

Meg
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Mar 23, 2020 2:31 am

Re: Domestic Discipline Blog: Personal: Staying On Track with Domestic Discipline

Post by Meg » Fri Mar 27, 2020 9:37 pm

We have been off the tracks for a while now, no virus needed! :( I can say that added structure is definitely beneficial for me in these times.

Post Reply