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Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 1:13 pm
by MrsSweetie
NateG wrote:
Fri Nov 16, 2018 12:37 pm
Just to add in, it can also cause nervousness with the Hoh too. Even after years of erotic spankings, it was a totally different experience preparing to give a punishment spanking.

Nate
Yes definitely for quite while didnt spank sweetie anywheres near hard enough cause scared off hurting him

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 1:16 pm
by NateG
Agreed. I usually have asked my wife about her opinion I guess.... especially if it was hard enough. That seemed to be the most difficult part. We have a tendency, I think..to not strike hard enough at first.

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Fri Nov 16, 2018 1:30 pm
by geeman
Most definitely normal to have some serious butterflies. It does get better over time, especially if spankings are fairly common. My wife uses a tawse, it is an evil piece of thick leather and it is very painful. My wife introduced spankings only within the last year or so and she told me pretty abruptly she didn't plan on 'tapping' me with her implement. It is fairly typical of her to apply punishment until I cry. Once the crying is sustained, she will stop. Sometimes that only takes a half dozen whacks, sometimes more.

I get it seems like a weird agreement to take the punishment but once you do, you will see the benefits. Both of you will.

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Tue Nov 20, 2018 10:04 pm
by Rand E
NateG wrote:
Fri Nov 16, 2018 12:37 pm
Just to add in, it can also cause nervousness with the Hoh too. Even after years of erotic spankings, it was a totally different experience preparing to give a punishment spanking.

Nate
I hear that! My wife and I have had a spanking relationship for over 25 years, but only this year did it actually entail any real discipline. Although, I have to admit that, unlike the practitioners on this forum, so far, it has been pretty much ad-hoc and unstructured. I'm trying to figure out what to do about that. Nevertheless, although the mechanics were familiar, actual corporal punishment turned out to be a totally new experience that blew my mind.

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 6:33 pm
by Mel41
Thanks everyone for the reassuring words! I am the one who initiated DD, although to my surprise he had been reading about for about a year before I ever brought it up. But the reality is, I'm sure, no where near the fantasy. My anxiety is about a 6/10 at the best of times. Knowing that I have a spanking coming will likely boost that to an 8 and cause me to lose sleep and not eat. Is this even a good fit for those of us who tend towards being more neurotic?

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 6:41 pm
by Joshua89
Hasn't gotten any better for me . When I know it's coming, my HOH always makes me wait until at least the next day (normally) and the "I'm about to get spanked" feeling is always prolonged. It sucks, but it us effective. Keeps me in a perfect submissive mindset (wanting to please, not by force but by admiration) for a few weeks afterwards.

Best of luck! The benefits outweigh the struggles

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 7:06 pm
by TheGoodWifeLife
I’m an anxious person and, as crazy as it sounds, after a spanking, I feel calm and “centered” again. The world is right and I’m loved and looked after. It’s always nerve wrecking to know you’ve got it coming, but the peace that comes after it’s over, that’s why we stay in these relationships :) Good luck! Keep us updated and feel free to ask anything. This is a good bunch of people.

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 9:59 pm
by Beauty
I completely agree with thegoodwifelife. The relief after it’s done properly and hard enough far outweighs the build up before. I love him more and am centered again. I try to remember that piece more and also relief of forgiveness instead of stuck in my head. I do still feel the complete dread when it’s for sure decided I’m to be punished. I think for me it’s all a mind set. I have to just accept what I’ve done is more than punishable and keep busy instead of stuck in my head before it happens. Hang in there!

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 10:50 pm
by Joshua89
TheGoodWifeLife wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 7:06 pm
I’m an anxious person and, as crazy as it sounds, after a spanking, I feel calm and “centered” again. The world is right and I’m loved and looked after. It’s always nerve wrecking to know you’ve got it coming, but the peace that comes after it’s over, that’s why we stay in these relationships :) Good luck! Keep us updated and feel free to ask anything. This is a good bunch of people.
That's very reassuring to know I'm not alone. Perfect description

Re: Brand New and Scared Shitless

Posted: Wed Nov 21, 2018 10:53 pm
by Joshua89
Beauty wrote:
Wed Nov 21, 2018 9:59 pm
I completely agree with thegoodwifelife. The relief after it’s done properly and hard enough far outweighs the build up before. I love him more and am centered again. I try to remember that piece more and also relief of forgiveness instead of stuck in my head. I do still feel the complete dread when it’s for sure decided I’m to be punished. I think for me it’s all a mind set. I have to just accept what I’ve done is more than punishable and keep busy instead of stuck in my head before it happens. Hang in there!
That is a perfect description as well! I'm not great with words, but you certainly explained many feelings. Thank you for sharing