I don't know what to do

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 4:04 pm

Okay, so some of you know my situation and some don't. I need help :( I don't know what to do. I got the worst spanking I have ever received. Last night and early this morning. A double whammy.
My butt hurts so much I don't know what to do :( I was, in the words of my husband, "Continuing to be a brat and purposely make him mad....which i did but felt i could weasel my way out of it and felt he deserved it. (I do not want to be spanked and I have been a pesky thorn in my husbands side since he started spanking me for some pranking and defiant and annoying behaviours to him)

I had this theory that if i could withstand all the spankings (no matter how much they hurt and I built up a tolerance) and talk about it non stop, that he would eventually "give up". I just felt he would. That he would see that it is NOT working. I feel like months and months of purposely making him mad and testing him have failed. He is not backing down.......... I hid his keys last night and his cell phone and hid some other items (which he doesn't know about yet) and was lippy to him last night because I don't like having someone tell me how to behave...I was not going to tell him where they were and make him look himself. (please don't start up on me, i have some issues with anger and I don't lash off or get physical, I get "Even"). It's a challenge I have had since I was a kid. I don't get mad I get even....
Well "Even" got me the hardest hand spanking I've ever had. Not just stinging but different kinds . He spanked me over his knee, bare butt and then pinned me down and spanked me over and over and then took me downstairs and spanked me over the pool table to "teach me a lesson". I had stinging and also now my butt feels like it's soooo sore in the muscle and bone and it hurts to sit and lift my right leg up...... Is this NORMAL? He does not do warm ups.. I push his buttons, that's it. Pants and panties down and several hard spankings with his hand :(

Lastly, we had a talk later today before he went to work. He told me this is how things are going to be, if I behave the way I am. He said he's going to start researching and possibly go on this forum now. He said he is in no way stopping.... I don't know what to do... We love each other and this is our stale mate... he said he will spank me if I do the following: Pester and purposely annoy him, hide things, mouth off, prank him, … to me it sounds like I'm having rules now!!! I don't know anything about DD except I think somehow we're in this lifestyle... but I don't know what to do. I asked him why he started spanking me and he said "it was his natural reaction and it felt the right thing to do because of my behavior. He doesn't know much about this site but know I go on here... now he wants to go on too..... I don't know what to do... He said Spanking is going to be a part of my life now as long as I "misbehave".... why is it up to him to decide what is "misbehaving"?? How do the wives of husbands handle spankings like this!! :( Neither one of us are leaving each other but how do I accept getting spankings??!!!! Anyway I can talk him out of them? Any tips on how to not be defiant and test someone? We have an equal relationship, but this is obviously a part of our relationship that just "happened" and now I'm getting very hard spankings :( Changing my lifetime behavior is not easy. I'm trying. I don't know what to do if he goes on this site and sees some of the stuff that people do. He promised me he will never use anything else but his hand (he has used spatual and wooden spoon in past but I tricked him out of those..) worried he'll find that out but he did promise and he keeps his promises....
Any advice? I don't know how to accept it.. I don't know how to make my butt feel better right now and I dont' know if he should go on these sites.. we talked about it and he and I thought if he is going to be spanking me that things should be done "properly"... what is happening!! Any tips on how to get out of this?? Changing my behavior is happening.. I am trying.. when I get upset, in the moment I can't help my mouth nor my temper of silent revenge...… Anybody on here figure out how to get out of spankings yet... for those that don't want them. I love my husband so it's not that I don't love him. I do with my whole heart. I just don't like his spankings and I had a really bad ones last night and this morning

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by Jwalker » Thu May 23, 2019 4:25 pm

It seems like he is spanking angrily and for trivial things.he married you and you were probably the same way when dating and engaged. So if it isn’t something you want to change about yourself, he shouldn’t really be spanking for it so often.if he is regularly leaving bruises, it sounds to be escalating quickly. Maybe there is something external bothering him (job, stress etc) that has caused the change in HIS personality, as stated in another thread, my wife and I aren’t DD. But she gets spanked (rarely) and did once even before marriage.

Evena
Posts: 70
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 1:25 pm
Location: Germany

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by Evena » Thu May 23, 2019 4:28 pm

Hi,

Just some thoughts from me. I think building up a tolerance ist a bad choice, just not happening and even if he just steps up his game. Deceiving did not seem to work well. So maybe consider giving in, discuss the rules of the household with him, accept the consequences for misbehaviour and grow up. so far he seems in the right track to correct your to be honest childish behaviour. And AS a Signal of good will before discussing household rules give him His things and own up to your misbehaviour.

Much love, eventhough tough one.

Evena, being straight to the point again. If i offend you let me know.

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 4:47 pm

Evena wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:28 pm
Hi,

Just some thoughts from me. I think building up a tolerance ist a bad choice, just not happening and even if he just steps up his game. Deceiving did not seem to work well. So maybe consider giving in, discuss the rules of the household with him, accept the consequences for misbehaviour and grow up. so far he seems in the right track to correct your to be honest childish behaviour. And AS a Signal of good will before discussing household rules give him His things and own up to your misbehaviour.

Much love, eventhough tough one.

Evena, being straight to the point again. If i offend you let me know.
thank you. no offence taken at all..., I just didn't see this coming... didn't see that I would have "rules" I will show him your advice tonight... I know i'm being childish now :( but I don't in the moment... only after.... and I was I admit seeing this as a game... because I wanted to outlast him, enjoyed making him annoyed and also enjoyed not giving in... I feel like if I give in, then I am losing a part of my personality and who I am(which is a very strong willed person). I am having trouble accepting that someone besides me is making rules... I was on my own a lot growing up. I had parents that were never around because they both worked and when they were around, one of them was very strict with me and mean so I found my own way. I ran away from home on and off since I was 14 and lived with friends and their family's and back home. I put my self through college, worked and partied as well as most of my friends were guy friends and I was always "one of the guys" and I have always been on my own. Anyone that messed with me got a prank or a silent revenge because I'm only 5ft 2 and petite. My revenge on anyone that hurt me or "messed with me" got pranks and often I was the only one who knew about them. It was and has always been my reaction when i'm hurt or mad and that is to take matters into my own hands. I'm having trouble accepting consequences... I always have and I have always challenged the consequences... I was determined to manipulate him... he knows me so therefore gave me the biggest spankings ever.... now I realize that this is not going to go my way.... I am having a severe learning curve here :(

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 4:53 pm

Jwalker wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:25 pm
It seems like he is spanking angrily and for trivial things.he married you and you were probably the same way when dating and engaged. So if it isn’t something you want to change about yourself, he shouldn’t really be spanking for it so often.if he is regularly leaving bruises, it sounds to be escalating quickly. Maybe there is something external bothering him (job, stress etc) that has caused the change in HIS personality, as stated in another thread, my wife and I aren’t DD. But she gets spanked (rarely) and did once even before marriage.
Yes, he is spanking me angrily. And yes, he knows exactly how I am and as far as I know, life is good... he did spank me a few times early when we were dating an married like 10 -13 years ago. but he stopped so long ago and it was only a couple times... I was a bit wild and a trouble maker so I don't disagree that those weren't deserved... it seems like I have a history of boyfriends or people treating me like this...and is not a fetish or anything I want... it just seems like it is something that happens.. my long time boyfriend before I was married had spanked me for behavior and also a couple others... I know that I cause some trouble... I just had married someone that I thought wouldn't be a spanker and here I am... getting spanked... Again :( my husband said it is just his natural reaction to do this to me. He is angry and that's it. He's had enough...… no more bruising as much.. my butt has a tolerance now...but sure hurting today. worst ever so now i'm thinking twice about my behavior that i'm having trouble changing … this is my desperate attempt how to get out of this, on my terms..... we aren't dd either... or so I thought. i'm like your wife.... why does your wife get spanked

Evena
Posts: 70
Joined: Sun Mar 17, 2019 1:25 pm
Location: Germany

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by Evena » Thu May 23, 2019 5:00 pm

Don't take it so hard. Everybody has rules and everybody has to grow up sometime. You are not one of the guys, you are a woman. You are his wife. It is good that he has expectations for you and that he cares to correct your behaviour. Maybe you just need to learn those life lessons you missed up till now. Being spanked is not bad, it means he cares enough to make you learn. And you have made that pretty difficult. Ask yourself what do you gain in submitting and excepting your place in your marriage? What do you gain by playing the rebel child?

Much love

Evena

Jwalker
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Mar 06, 2019 7:12 am

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by Jwalker » Thu May 23, 2019 5:06 pm

girlzruleboyzdrool4u wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:53 pm
Jwalker wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:25 pm
It seems like he is spanking angrily and for trivial things.he married you and you were probably the same way when dating and engaged. So if it isn’t something you want to change about yourself, he shouldn’t really be spanking for it so often.if he is regularly leaving bruises, it sounds to be escalating quickly. Maybe there is something external bothering him (job, stress etc) that has caused the change in HIS personality, as stated in another thread, my wife and I aren’t DD. But she gets spanked (rarely) and did once even before marriage.
Yes, he is spanking me angrily. And yes, he knows exactly how I am and as far as I know, life is good... he did spank me a few times early when we were dating an married like 10 -13 years ago. but he stopped so long ago and it was only a couple times... I was a bit wild and a trouble maker so I don't disagree that those weren't deserved... it seems like I have a history of boyfriends or people treating me like this...and is not a fetish or anything I want... it just seems like it is something that happens.. my long time boyfriend before I was married had spanked me for behavior and also a couple others... I know that I cause some trouble... I just had married someone that I thought wouldn't be a spanker and here I am... getting spanked... Again :( my husband said it is just his natural reaction to do this to me. He is angry and that's it. He's had enough...… no more bruising as much.. my butt has a tolerance now...but sure hurting today. worst ever so now i'm thinking twice about my behavior that i'm having trouble changing … this is my desperate attempt how to get out of this, on my terms..... we aren't dd either... or so I thought. i'm like your wife.... why does your wife get spanked
She has been spanked for a speeding ticket, going over the data on her phone two months in a row (for not connecting to the home internet)freaking out on me in public and in front of family (long story) and not following though on her new business tasks. She is not spanked for not cleaning or spending money like some on here. Also there is no sexual aspect to it. If she’s not in the mood or did t want to try something new, that is fine and respected. It’s relatively rare that she actually gets disciplined. Every week she does get a mostly playful over the knee reminder, more ceremonial than maintenance. It also is more of foreplay at that time just two loving adults, one with her bottom bare, in a submissive position even if not in a submissive mindset

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 5:22 pm

Jwalker wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 5:06 pm
girlzruleboyzdrool4u wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:53 pm
Jwalker wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 4:25 pm
It seems like he is spanking angrily and for trivial things.he married you and you were probably the same way when dating and engaged. So if it isn’t something you want to change about yourself, he shouldn’t really be spanking for it so often.if he is regularly leaving bruises, it sounds to be escalating quickly. Maybe there is something external bothering him (job, stress etc) that has caused the change in HIS personality, as stated in another thread, my wife and I aren’t DD. But she gets spanked (rarely) and did once even before marriage.
Yes, he is spanking me angrily. And yes, he knows exactly how I am and as far as I know, life is good... he did spank me a few times early when we were dating an married like 10 -13 years ago. but he stopped so long ago and it was only a couple times... I was a bit wild and a trouble maker so I don't disagree that those weren't deserved... it seems like I have a history of boyfriends or people treating me like this...and is not a fetish or anything I want... it just seems like it is something that happens.. my long time boyfriend before I was married had spanked me for behavior and also a couple others... I know that I cause some trouble... I just had married someone that I thought wouldn't be a spanker and here I am... getting spanked... Again :( my husband said it is just his natural reaction to do this to me. He is angry and that's it. He's had enough...… no more bruising as much.. my butt has a tolerance now...but sure hurting today. worst ever so now i'm thinking twice about my behavior that i'm having trouble changing … this is my desperate attempt how to get out of this, on my terms..... we aren't dd either... or so I thought. i'm like your wife.... why does your wife get spanked
She has been spanked for a speeding ticket, going over the data on her phone two months in a row (for not connecting to the home internet)freaking out on me in public and in front of family (long story) and not following though on her new business tasks. She is not spanked for not cleaning or spending money like some on here. Also there is no sexual aspect to it. If she’s not in the mood or did t want to try something new, that is fine and respected. It’s relatively rare that she actually gets disciplined. Every week she does get a mostly playful over the knee reminder, more ceremonial than maintenance. It also is more of foreplay at that time just two loving adults, one with her bottom bare, in a submissive position even if not in a submissive mindset
Okay, yes, there is no sexual aspect of it here either and I'm not spanked for cleaning or spending money either.. just some of my behaviours… i'm just trying to understand a mindset here.. but maybe yours and my husbands aren't quite the same in some ways...

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 5:30 pm

Evena wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 5:00 pm
Don't take it so hard. Everybody has rules and everybody has to grow up sometime. You are not one of the guys, you are a woman. You are his wife. It is good that he has expectations for you and that he cares to correct your behaviour. Maybe you just need to learn those life lessons you missed up till now. Being spanked is not bad, it means he cares enough to make you learn. And you have made that pretty difficult. Ask yourself what do you gain in submitting and excepting your place in your marriage? What do you gain by playing the rebel child?

Much love

Evena
Thank you... i'm taking it hard.. trying not to. Just feels weird to give in. It's just he knows this is me! So not sure why he's "standing for it anymore and that's a good thing" so he says. To me being spanked is bad. It hurts! I had no problem handling it but he has decided to spank me a lot harder than I thought he ever would have so I guess here I am.. The thing is we have a great marriage, besides this!! I don't even know I'm being a rebel child... that's the thing. it's like an instinct in me to behave the way I do.... i'll try to smarten up... it's not going to be easy

girlzruleboyzdrool4u
Posts: 109
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 4:58 pm

Re: I don't know what to do

Post by girlzruleboyzdrool4u » Thu May 23, 2019 5:51 pm

girlzruleboyzdrool4u wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 5:30 pm
Evena wrote:
Thu May 23, 2019 5:00 pm
Don't take it so hard. Everybody has rules and everybody has to grow up sometime. You are not one of the guys, you are a woman. You are his wife. It is good that he has expectations for you and that he cares to correct your behaviour. Maybe you just need to learn those life lessons you missed up till now. Being spanked is not bad, it means he cares enough to make you learn. And you have made that pretty difficult. Ask yourself what do you gain in submitting and excepting your place in your marriage? What do you gain by playing the rebel child?

Much love

Evena
Thank you... i'm taking it hard.. trying not to. Just feels weird to give in. It's just he knows this is me! So not sure why he's "standing for it anymore and that's a good thing" so he says. To me being spanked is bad. It hurts! I had no problem handling it but he has decided to spank me a lot harder than I thought he ever would have so I guess here I am.. The thing is we have a great marriage, besides this!! I don't even know I'm being a rebel child... that's the thing. it's like an instinct in me to behave the way I do.... i'll try to smarten up... it's not going to be easy
thank you for your help

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