I’ve been a member for almost four months now. And I’m grateful for all of your contributions on this site!
It has really made me much more aware of the depth and width of our particular choice of living.
Two observations that I’d like to hear your views and thought on:
First, by giving a wife rules – and enforcing them – isn’t that also a way to increase the attention on her?
I know few, if any, wives, outside the DD-paradigm, that has so attentive husbands!
In his classical book “The Ideal Marriage” , van der Velde writes something like: The worst way of treating a wife is not physical abuse – it’s neglect! To ignore her…
What do you, the wives, think of that if you compare yourself to your non-DD friends?
Then a second reflection, of another nature: Forgiveness.
How do we ensure that our ways, as HoH:s, of punishing our TiH:s, leads to forgiveness?
I mean – that she or he feels forgiven, loved and rebooted afterwards?
Sometimes a spanking – even when it’s well deserved – can leave the TiH even more devastated than before the punishment. How can we make sure the spanking leads to atonement? A deep feeling of being forgiven, that all is fine?
Another wise man, not van der Velde though, once said that corner time and spankings should transform shame into guilt. And you can be liberated from guilt.
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