Interference & public spankings

Spanking and Domestic Discipline
Chelsea12
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Jul 25, 2017 9:36 am
Location: North West, AR

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Chelsea12 » Thu Dec 21, 2017 9:55 am

cowboy wrote:
Wed Dec 20, 2017 11:16 am
I have been spanked publicly many times. My former Dominant would use the humiliation of being spanked in public to add to the punishment. As far a semi-public venues, this is a common occurrence even to this day. We attend many spanking parties and events and visit dungeons. Where these are not primarily punishment spankings, they are witnessed by many people. The spanking parties we attend are mostly CFNM functions, so being totally nude and spanked in front of or by other females in common place. At dungeons, interference is against protocol and not done at all. Occasionally a Dominant will request assistance from another to administer a complete spanking session, but not normally.
Cowboy, this has more to do with something you wrote on another thread but I cannot remember which it was so I will ask here. Do you have any friends who practice DD? Also, I am not sure how to phrase this so I am sorry if I word it wrong. Would you say you are more DD centered or BDSM(?) centered? It sounds like you participate in both so I am curious how you distinguish punishment spankings from other types. Is it the intent behind it that separates them or something more?
Love & ✨Light

cowboy
Posts: 47
Joined: Wed Dec 13, 2017 4:21 pm
Location: NY - summer Tn - winter

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by cowboy » Thu Dec 21, 2017 11:47 am

We have friends who are also living in DD relationships. I was involved in BDSM prior to living in a DD relationship. Here family was BDSM oriented, so we both have BDSM tendencies which interweave with our DD relationship. Hard to say which lifestyle is in effect more , but I would think our DD is because it is 24/7. BDSM only exists when we visit a dungeon or an event. As to the different types of spankings we use, intent is certainly a factor. However there are differences in the physical spanking procedure. Discipline or punishment spankings are the result of rule breaking or bad behavior on my part. They are usually administered as soon after the infraction as possible. Most normally no one else is present, but it has happened. Punishment spankings are short and harsh guided by our written list of offenses which each has a 3 level of punishment prescribed. She does have the power to alter anything about the prescribed discipline. These types of spankings have no warm up, no safe word and no after care. Most likely they are administered at home, not in a dungeon or party or event. Seldom, it may occur. Maintenance spankings on the other hand are generally quite long, sometimes an hour or so. They are scheduled and use a warm up. I have a safe word, but have never used it during a maintenance spanking. She employs some kind of after care, like cuddling, etc. We have used dungeon visits or parties to serve as maintenance spankings. Then there are fun spankings, used just because we both like spanking, she to give, myself to receive. We do these at home, but mainly at parties, dungeons or events. We also use stress relief spankings when needed. I know some do not believe in stress relief spankings, but they work for us. I hope this explanation is not too long winded.

Kerry
Posts: 624
Joined: Wed Oct 04, 2017 11:54 pm
Location: Midwest US submissive female with male HoH partner

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Kerry » Thu Dec 21, 2017 2:23 pm

With all due respect, I think I understand now why you criticized me. No aftercare does not sound like Loving Domestic Discipline and that is my goal. Your ideas and practices are just different than mine.
Last edited by Kerry on Thu Dec 21, 2017 7:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Chelsea12
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Jul 25, 2017 9:36 am
Location: North West, AR

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Chelsea12 » Thu Dec 21, 2017 5:31 pm

cowboy wrote:
Thu Dec 21, 2017 11:47 am
We have friends who are also living in DD relationships. I was involved in BDSM prior to living in a DD relationship. Here family was BDSM oriented, so we both have BDSM tendencies which interweave with our DD relationship. Hard to say which lifestyle is in effect more , but I would think our DD is because it is 24/7. BDSM only exists when we visit a dungeon or an event. As to the different types of spankings we use, intent is certainly a factor. However there are differences in the physical spanking procedure. Discipline or punishment spankings are the result of rule breaking or bad behavior on my part. They are usually administered as soon after the infraction as possible. Most normally no one else is present, but it has happened. Punishment spankings are short and harsh guided by our written list of offenses which each has a 3 level of punishment prescribed. She does have the power to alter anything about the prescribed discipline. These types of spankings have no warm up, no safe word and no after care. Most likely they are administered at home, not in a dungeon or party or event. Seldom, it may occur. Maintenance spankings on the other hand are generally quite long, sometimes an hour or so. They are scheduled and use a warm up. I have a safe word, but have never used it during a maintenance spanking. She employs some kind of after care, like cuddling, etc. We have used dungeon visits or parties to serve as maintenance spankings. Then there are fun spankings, used just because we both like spanking, she to give, myself to receive. We do these at home, but mainly at parties, dungeons or events. We also use stress relief spankings when needed. I know some do not believe in stress relief spankings, but they work for us. I hope this explanation is not too long winded.
Not too long winded at all Cowboy! Being new to DD I appreciate any and all information about what works for other people. The more information I have, the more aspects I can think about, the more idea of what sounds like might work for my relationship I have and can share with my HoH.

I do wonder though, does the lack of aftercare bother you? It seems like you would be missing out on part of the bonding that can happen with DD. Do you feel you get enough of the bonding by participating in aftercare with the BDSM part? Also, I was not aware there is a group who don't believe in stress relief spankings. Do you have any idea what might be their train of thought? I have not been there yet but I could definitely see the use of stress relief spankings.
Love & ✨Light

cowboy
Posts: 47
Joined: Wed Dec 13, 2017 4:21 pm
Location: NY - summer Tn - winter

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by cowboy » Sun Dec 24, 2017 12:15 am

Kerry wrote:
Thu Dec 21, 2017 2:23 pm
With all due respect, I think I understand now why you criticized me. No aftercare does not sound like Loving Domestic Discipline and that is my goal. Your ideas and practices are just different than mine.
I don't recall criticizing you, but will apologize if I did. Every relationship is different and of course mine is different from yours. No after care is only for discipline, we use after care for other types of spankings. Again, I am sorry, Kerry

cowboy
Posts: 47
Joined: Wed Dec 13, 2017 4:21 pm
Location: NY - summer Tn - winter

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by cowboy » Sun Dec 24, 2017 12:22 am

Chelsea12 wrote:
Thu Dec 21, 2017 5:31 pm
cowboy wrote:
Thu Dec 21, 2017 11:47 am
We have friends who are also living in DD relationships. I was involved in BDSM prior to living in a DD relationship. Here family was BDSM oriented, so we both have BDSM tendencies which interweave with our DD relationship. Hard to say which lifestyle is in effect more , but I would think our DD is because it is 24/7. BDSM only exists when we visit a dungeon or an event. As to the different types of spankings we use, intent is certainly a factor. However there are differences in the physical spanking procedure. Discipline or punishment spankings are the result of rule breaking or bad behavior on my part. They are usually administered as soon after the infraction as possible. Most normally no one else is present, but it has happened. Punishment spankings are short and harsh guided by our written list of offenses which each has a 3 level of punishment prescribed. She does have the power to alter anything about the prescribed discipline. These types of spankings have no warm up, no safe word and no after care. Most likely they are administered at home, not in a dungeon or party or event. Seldom, it may occur. Maintenance spankings on the other hand are generally quite long, sometimes an hour or so. They are scheduled and use a warm up. I have a safe word, but have never used it during a maintenance spanking. She employs some kind of after care, like cuddling, etc. We have used dungeon visits or parties to serve as maintenance spankings. Then there are fun spankings, used just because we both like spanking, she to give, myself to receive. We do these at home, but mainly at parties, dungeons or events. We also use stress relief spankings when needed. I know some do not believe in stress relief spankings, but they work for us. I hope this explanation is not too long winded.
Not too long winded at all Cowboy! Being new to DD I appreciate any and all information about what works for other people. The more information I have, the more aspects I can think about, the more idea of what sounds like might work for my relationship I have and can share with my HoH.

I do wonder though, does the lack of aftercare bother you? It seems like you would be missing out on part of the bonding that can happen with DD. Do you feel you get enough of the bonding by participating in aftercare with the BDSM part? Also, I was not aware there is a group who don't believe in stress relief spankings. Do you have any idea what might be their train of thought? I have not been there yet but I could definitely see the use of stress relief spankings.
After is not given after a discipline spanking. She leaves me alone to reflect on my behavior which resulted in the punishment. After care is an important part of the other types of spankings, especially maintenance spankings.

I don't know if there is a group who don't use stress spankings. I think I meant that they don't believe a spanking can relieve stress, not that they don't believe in the use of stress relief spankings. I hope that is not more confusing.

Kerry
Posts: 624
Joined: Wed Oct 04, 2017 11:54 pm
Location: Midwest US submissive female with male HoH partner

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Kerry » Mon Dec 25, 2017 8:59 am

Cowboy, I need to apologize to you. I’ve been very sad and overly sensitive lately and it wasn’t even you who criticized me. I just thought it was you. I’m not usually a person who would strike back, even in a subdued way, but I felt criticized and lots of outside pressures. Anyway, I’m sorry for what I said. Merry Christmas
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cowboy
Posts: 47
Joined: Wed Dec 13, 2017 4:21 pm
Location: NY - summer Tn - winter

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by cowboy » Mon Dec 25, 2017 11:02 pm

No need to apologize, Kerry, Misunderstandings happen on all our parts. It is over and I wish you a Merry Christmas as well.

Kerry
Posts: 624
Joined: Wed Oct 04, 2017 11:54 pm
Location: Midwest US submissive female with male HoH partner

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Kerry » Tue Dec 26, 2017 10:11 am

Thank you Cowboy:)
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Sir and Scarlet
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Dec 26, 2017 11:10 am

Re: Interference & public spankings

Post by Sir and Scarlet » Tue Dec 26, 2017 11:22 am

So this is interesting that on my first day on the boards. Scarlet and I don't postpone spankings due to where we were. I don't think that you have to mortgage a measure of discretion. When we started out the training season when we first started, she was required to remind me that she was to get a small role affirmation at the bottom of every hour, no matter where we were. There were many times when we pulled into a park, go behind a grocery store, or just park in a manner that doesn't allow a great deal of viewing and give her the quick spanking. Family rest rooms are excellent places to conduct a quick discipline. We always make sure that we have a quiet implement with us to conduct to the spanking. She really responded well to role affirmation spankings like this, because she prefers them to real punishment.

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