Punishment when pregnant

Spanking and Domestic Discipline
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Lauren
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by Lauren » Thu Nov 05, 2020 11:50 pm

Feelings and emotional reactions are two different things. I agree with everything you just said. Jacob is saying in his first statement that you can not control how you react to your emotions but then in the next paragraph stating that you can.

Jacob HF
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by Jacob HF » Fri Nov 06, 2020 3:27 am

VernAKmiss wrote:
Thu Nov 05, 2020 11:41 pm
I think that what Jacob is saying is...
Yes, exactly.
Lauren wrote:
Thu Nov 05, 2020 11:50 pm
Jacob is saying in his first statement that you can not control how you react to your emotions but then in the next paragraph stating that you can.
I am sorry that I miscommunicated. I mean to say that when a situation happens we can not control how our emotions will react to that situation, but we can control how we act based on those emotions.

--Jacob

AWE_1993
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by AWE_1993 » Sat Nov 07, 2020 6:31 am

If I may, I agree with Lauren on this one, I've been following this thread for input on pregnancy and DD and I did think that there was a contradiction in Jacob's words but I get what he was trying to say as per VernAKmiss review of it.

I might also add that I feel like external reactions (verbal, physical, etc.) that comes from a particular unbalanced emotional state is almost impossible to control, in another post where we talked about involuntary reactions like eye rolling we came to a conclusion that it is possible to train those bad reactions out of someone but if that process has not been already completed, someone in a hormonal or emotional outburst can show those involuntary bad reactions with even more intensity, and that is something that is just uncontrollable. On the other hand there are people who use their current state, regardless of what it is, as an excuse to do whatever bad thing they want. I think it's the responsibility of HoH to to be very attentive on what is one of those two things and what might be the other, because the first will need a much more deep treatment with good communication that may or may not lead to punishment and the latter should be a reason for punishment right away.

Alice

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Phil04
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by Phil04 » Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:17 am

There are two parts to this question. One is the physical punishment portion. It is natural to have concerns about the well-being of baby and the "comfort" of the wife during a spanking. Although I have not seen anything that saids a properly conducted spanking (focused on the bottom) poses any risk to the child, I do also know a few couple who decided not to risk it and went to non-physical punishments. Mostly early bed time, loss of privileges, ect... This comes down to doing what you are comfortable with.

The second part is the issue of hormones. Yes, hormone levels get all wacky during pregnancy, but they also do during a woman's monthly period. Are you going to excuse disrespectful behavior on a monthly basis? The fact is women can control their behavior despite hormone shifts. They do it all the time workplace. In our house hormones are no excuse for disrespectful behavior.

Phil

AWE_1993
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by AWE_1993 » Sun Nov 08, 2020 4:48 pm

Phil04 wrote:
Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:17 am
Are you going to excuse disrespectful behavior on a monthly basis? The fact is women can control their behavior despite hormone shifts. They do it all the time workplace.
No Phill, that is definitely no excuse for bad behavior.
And still I endorse my argument that what matters in those situations is the cause of that behavior, which determines if it is or if it isn't an involuntary reaction to the stress and hormonal swings, that should be well looked upon so one doesn't hurt the woman who might be already unbalanced by the changes of her own body. On another note, yes we can control our actions in any environment, but think of the home as the woman's safe place to finally release all that's been bottling up through the day or the week during a period, now I think the focus of DD in this case should be directing how this emotional liberation can happen in the most respectful and healthy manner for both parties, be it through punishment or not.

Alice.

Jacob HF
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by Jacob HF » Sun Nov 08, 2020 9:10 pm

That is why women choose men to be husbands and not computers.

Husbands should always use good judgment and always take into consideration all mitigating and aggravating circumstances.

--Jacob

AWE_1993
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by AWE_1993 » Mon Nov 09, 2020 5:44 am

Idk, I can program some pretty good stuff ahaha :lol:

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MrX
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by MrX » Fri Nov 13, 2020 4:36 pm

NewHoh wrote:
Thu Nov 05, 2020 4:11 pm
I've also been more hesitant to discipline her for talking disrespectfully because at times I feel she's just hormonal and it's not fair for me to hold her accountable. Am I right? Or should I still expect her respect
I don't mean to be unkind, so hopefully, you take this in the spirit of brotherly encouragement from someone whose been doing this for a long time - but I couldn't help but chuckle at this part.

By my math, if pregnancy was a get out of jail free card for disrespect, my wife would have been free to be disrespectful for almost a third of our marriage. Suffice to say ... rules around respectfulness apply even during pregnancy in our house. :lol:

Now to the more practical concern - certainly, positions and techniques of spanking should be modified as the pregnancy progresses.

And to the macro discussion around emotions versus actions - this is where I feel, as a husband, that I have some level of responsibility to intervene before my wife's emotions get her into trouble.

Pregnant or not, if I saw that my wife's emotions, hormones, or general attitude were in a place that was likely to lead to her breaking a rule, I would do my best to stop it from escalating - whether that's sending her to time out for a bit, or to do some lines, or giving her an early bedtime. The intent is to stop her attitude from turning into negative actions.

But at the same time - the rules are still the rules. If her poor attitude turns into poor choices that result in a rule being broken, then she's getting spanked.

There have been many times in our marriage where she can tell that her attitude is just "off", and she'll proactively tell me so that I can take some sort of countermeasure that would prevent her from getting herself in trouble - she knows that hormones are not an excuse for poor behavior, but she also knows that she can tell me, "Please help me from getting myself in trouble because I am feeling super hormonal today" and I'll do everything in my power to keep her from getting herself in trouble, short of letting her off the hook for breaking a rule.

David19
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by David19 » Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:30 pm

It’s been a long time since my DD was pregnant. Disrespectfulness should still be addressed but you must take into account her delicate condition and hormones. Her bottom should still be bared and spanked albeit a token spanking, hopefully that will help her adjust her behaviour.

David

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DesertRose
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Re: Punishment when pregnant

Post by DesertRose » Tue Nov 24, 2020 3:37 pm

MrX wrote:
Fri Nov 13, 2020 4:36 pm

Pregnant or not, if I saw that my wife's emotions, hormones, or general attitude were in a place that was likely to lead to her breaking a rule, I would do my best to stop it from escalating - whether that's sending her to time out for a bit, or to do some lines, or giving her an early bedtime. The intent is to stop her attitude from turning into negative actions.
How often are you successful to stop her attitude from escalating?
🌸 I want a husband who will love me enough to punish me.
DesertRose

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